Today I visited the “Over the Hill on the Yellow Brick Road Museum.” When I entered, the first thing I saw was the aging Mona Lisa hanging on the wall. I was shocked to see her there! So I had to ask…
Mona Lisa! What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be in the Louvre in France?
MONA LISA: Yes. But I had to get away from the Leonardo Di Vinci branding thing. I mean, he was a great artist and all, but I’m getting older and I don’t want to be in his shadow till the end of time. The Mona Lisa painting was his creative vision, not mine. My own creative voice is dying to speak. I had to separate.
So, what’s your creative voice begging to blurt out?
MONA LISA: I’d love to tell the world the true, heartfelt reason I’m half smiling in my portrait.
Go for it.
MONA LISA: Well, years ago, on the morning Leonardo was painting my face, it was taking forever. I sat for hours and hours and hours. I was starving. I soooo needed a lunch break. So, I started thinking about all the awesome food I’d eat when we’d finally break for lunch.
Like what?
MONA LISA: Bread, meat, fish, potatoes, tomatoes, kidney beans, Indian corn, chocolate, peanuts, pineapples, red and green peppers, turkeys and tapioca! And I’d wash it all down with a glass of wine.
Sounds good to me.
MONA LISA: The thought of all that food made me start to smile! But then! I stopped myself!
Why??
MONA LISA: Because I knew if I ate that feast, I’d put on weight. Quite honestly, I have the worst metabolism in the world. Whatever I eat, I wear. Immediately. I was afraid if I sat down and posed for the rest of my portrait, my stomach would stick out to the moon. Leonardo would have to repaint that section and he’d be furious!
I can imagine.
MONA LISA: So I stopped thinking of all that food and didn’t smile. But a second later, I started thinking of the food again because I was so hungry! I smiled! Then I stopped! I smiled! I stopped!
Hence the half smile. So what did you finally eat for lunch?
MONA LISA: Green peppers and tapioca. I tried to strike a balance. But here’s the bottom line. Now, as I’m much older, it seems like no matter what I eat, I put on weight.
I think for some of us, that’s a “new normal” that comes with aging.
MONA LISA: Maybe. But I’m hoping from now on, when people look at my portrait, they’ll relate to my ongoing struggle to stay at a healthy weight. I hope they’ll remember who I am and what I stood for. And in some way….maybe I’ll inspire them as well.
Well…Mona… by bravely sharing your longtime feelings and letting your true self shine through, you’ve set a glowing example for ME.
copyrightoverthehillontheyellowbrickroad2017
OVER THE HILL on the YELLOW BRICK ROAD 
And for our LBGT friends, rumor has it Mona was actually Leonardo DaVinci in drag. I don’t really believe that, but it would give another reason t for the smirk.
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Ha ha! Love that! Actually, I also have to admit I love the pink tint in Mona’s graying hair. There’s nothing like Brillo for a trendy look.
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UGH…my hair is brillo in the summer! So now, when I make food choices, I will think of Mona Lisa’s smile! I have my own smiles for all the plays you wrote that we acted out for our parents, growing up!!! lol
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I remember those plays, too! In your basement! Good times!
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Of course, I now can’t stop thinking about the song..Portrait of My Love:
There could never be a portrait of my love
For nobody could paint a dream
You will never see a portrait of my love
For miracles are never seen
Anyone who sees her, soon forgets the Mona Lisa (but believe me…NO ONE WILL FORGET THIS AVANT-GARDE BRILLO LOOK–I’m so ahead in sporting this soon-to-be fashionable style)
It would take I know, a Michelangelo
And he would need the glow of dawn that paints the sky above
To try and paint a portrait of my love
It would take I know, a Michelangelo
And he would need the glow of dawn that paints the sky above,
To try and paint a portrait of my love
Songwriters: Cyril Ornadel / Norman Newell
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OMG! I love that song! It’s one of my favorites from the sixties! About the Brillo–I’ve been thinking of putting a pink streak in my hair for years. Maybe I’m living vicariously. LOL
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Very witty writing as usual…thank you for your creativity!
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Thank you! Your comment means a lot to me!
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This is brilliant!! I’m always thinking about food, just like Mona Lisa! I even have the devious half smile when I think of lunch 😂
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The only time you can’t half smile is when your face is stuffed with food. 🙂
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That IS true! But, maybe I’ll have to test that just to be sure 😉😉😉
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Haaaa haaaa!
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Haha! Love this conversation! 😄 Knowing it was all about the food makes this painting even better for me 😉
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Me too! My ongoing struggle.
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Reblogged this on Haddon Musings and commented:
Cathi gives us another hilarious take on an icon.
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Hi Bernadette–Thank you so very much for reblogging my Mona Lisa conversation. Mona thanks you as well! It’s a real pleasure sharing posts with you. 🙂
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I am trying to catchup on some of your previous writings. I love everything you write. You have such a creative way of making your point.
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Aaah, thank you very much. You just made my day. I’m so glad these “conversations” mean something to you. Also–believe me, I’m not trying to sell you on anything, but I actually wrote a book filled with these”conversations” –different conversations that are not on my blog. Together, the “conversations” tell a story and have an overall message. If that sounds interesting to you, here’s the link to amazon.com: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=over+the+hill+on+the+yellow+brick+road
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