Traveling Over the Hill on the Yellow Brick Road, I came to a fork in the road. The path that led to the left had a powerful, bright light at the end. The path on the right led to TJ Maxx. My favorite clothing store. Which was the correct way to go?! I noticed a dried flower floating toward the bright light. Actually, it was a beautiful, dried rose. I asked her opinion…
Excuse me! Dried flower? Do you know which way to go?
DRIED FLOWER: It’s a matter of opinion. I’m surprised you’re talking to me.
Why?
DRIED FLOWER: Because I’m dead.
No problem. I’ve always wanted to talk to someone dead.
DRIED FLOWER: Okay. Your choice. So, what do you want to know?
How do you know you’re dead?
DRIED FLOWER: I Googled it. The definition of death is, “the cessation of all vital functions.” Since I don’t have to make sure I have water or sunlight anymore to keep going or growing, it sounds like the right diagnosis.
How does it feel to be dead?
DRIED FLOWER: Kind of freeing in a way. I can let go of stress and move on. But this is crazy. I’m sure you can’t relate.
In some ways I can. I mean, even though I’m alive, some parts of me have passed on.
DRIED FLOWER: What are you talking about?
Well, I used to have brown hair. Now it’s gray. I’ll never have brown hair again. That phase within my body has died. Passed on.
DRIED FLOWER: Interesting. What else?
I used to menstruate, but that part of my system has shut down. Died. I’ll never get my period again. And there’s more. There are emotional deaths.
DRIED FLOWER: Like what?
Well, I remember when I was a teenager, one summer I went to sleep away camp. I was obsessed with the boys and having a boyfriend. There was a newness, a crispness, a freshness about the anticipation of that experience. I can’t really describe it, but it was so exciting. Even if I tried to go back to that phase of life, I’d experience it differently because I’d bring wisdom and perspective to it now. That phase of my life has passed on. I’ll never feel quite that way again.
DRIED FLOWER: Hmmm…
But then, there are other emotional phases I’m happy have died. Like, for years I used to be terrified of thunderstorms. If thunderstorms were in the weather forecast, I’d hide in a bathroom with no windows while the storms passed through. But then! When my son was born, I suddenly wasn’t afraid of thunderstorms anymore. Out of nowhere.
DRIED FLOWER: Maybe you realized you had bigger things to worry about.
Maybe. Now I actually love thunderstorms.
DRIED FLOWER: That’s nice.
So you know? Maybe life and death aren’t black and white. Maybe deaths are just series of cycles that move on to new cycles…even during life. I mean, look at you. You’re dead, but you’re an elegant, rust color. You’re very beautiful.
DRIED FLOWER: Thanks, but I gotta go now. I’m feeling pulled toward the bright light. Want to come?
No thanks. I’m going shopping.
DRIED FLOWER: What’s so enticing about TJ Maxx?
When you go in, you have to wade through a lot of stuff to find something you really like. You might find something, you might not. But if you do, it’s the greatest feeling, and it’s probably on sale so it’s within your reach.
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With that, I took a few steps toward the store. I turned around to say good-bye to the dried flower, but she was gone.
Copyrightoverthehillontheyellowbrickroad2018
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Oh goodness! I love this!!! Also, that’s one of my favorite shopping places too. There and Marshall’s
I like the hunt!
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Yeah, I like Marshall’s too! H & M is another big one on my list.
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I loved this Cathi. Like you parts of me are no longer BUT I have new parts which have come with age. I have freedom to come and go as I wish, no one to answer to. I can get up and go to bed when I want and I can paint all day long. My list is endless to the benefits of getting old. I love it. 🌹
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As always, what you have to say is so inspiring and true! Love it.
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I love this…I really do. Enchanting and spot on…that’s a wonderful, delicate balance. I’ve always had a fascination with death and you may have hit on some of it…but then to tie it all in with TJ’s…WoW!
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Thank you for your kind words. It means so much to me that you “get it” and understand. Most importantly, I hope I bump into you in TJ Maxx one day! I’m on my way there now. 🙂
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You’re on!
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Ha ha! Yaaay!
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Spot on. Some bits die, others live on in freedom
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Great way to say it!
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You hit the top 2 – hair and female cycles – but you know, when I think about it with a clear (dust off the emotions of saying goodbye to the stage) each one of those changes has brought about a new part of me to enjoy and grow along with the change. I enjoyed your conversation! PS – I enjoy TJ Maxx, too!! It’s hard to come out of there empty-handed 😉
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Sometimes I wallow in the sadness of loss more than I look forward to the changes they allow for. That’s my journey and chance for growth, I guess…along with being privileged to take trips to TJ Maxx on a regular basis. 🙂
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I love not being afraid of things that I once was.
And the hunt at TJ Maxx – Love that too!
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I love the hunt at TJ Maxx too. But…unfortunately, I’m still as afraid of things as I once was. In fact, I’ve even come up with some new fears in older age. Listening to your perspective really helps.
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I can’t comment on TJ Maxx, as there’s not one here, but I do enjoy some of the freedoms that come with age.
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I was thinking of you when I wrote this post, knowing you’re from Canada. I Googled TJ Maxx locations and saw there isn’t one in Canada. But…you probably have similar stores where you live. Is there an H & M? It’s a bit like that.
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Maybe an H &M in one of the larger cities, but not here. It’s probably similar to Winners.
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In any case, you get the idea. Bright light vs. shopping. 🙂
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My desire to go to TJ Max!
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Ha ha! I have to say, one thing pissed me off in TJ Maxx the last time I was there (this week). They added skinny mirrors. I used to count on TJ Maxx in the dressing rooms. No matter how crummy I looked in whatever I tried on, at least I knew when I brought it home I wouldn’t look worse. I have been betrayed!!!!!
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I love this! And TJ Maxx, Marshalls and especially Home Good’s! Lol! It’s all about the treasure hunt
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Yup! Home Goods is my other favorite! Where else can you find an inexpensive, pink frying pan?
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Hahaha. So true!
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I love this! One of the things in me that has died is the ability to eat whatever I want. In the past six years I’ve developed a bunch of food allergies and greasy, rich food makes me feel really sick. On a different note – I too love TJ Maxx and Home Goods (of course I do)!
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I love when fear dies. It is the greatest feeling. I love TJ Maxx, sifting through all the items is like a treasure hunt! 💗💗
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There is freedom in having things ‘die off’ especially if they are toxic emotions like, jealousy, greed, pride, etc. Once they are dead, there is space to embrace true love and peace. How’s that for some philosophizing this morning, Cathi? Ooh! My head hurts. Now I’ll go lay down for a while. haha!
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Ha ha! So glad you wrote. Great comment–it’s kind of like forgiving someone. When you do, the air clears. I’m glad you’re feeling better every day and I think of you a lot.
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Thank you, Cathi. I am almost normal again! Or at least, my version of ‘normal.’ Haha!
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Fantastic!!!!!!!!!
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Loved this! … I hate to think about death but I’ve never looked at it like this before, the parts of us that die and offer new beginnings. Having children has been a big change, the want for myself has died & become wasn’t for my children instead. I guess it hasn’t died but evolved instead… X
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I know what you mean, when I had children I went through the same transition. Actually, there was something nice about it, suddenly the whole world wasn’t solely about me. Maybe that’s a good thing????
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Very true… X
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I absolutely agree with this – our lives go through cycles and parts of us change or move on, which is kind of like dying, but there is always the opportunity for growth and new life too. I’m coming up to 50 and I feel like I’m starting another life now. 🙂
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I began having that “starting a new life” feeling when my children grew up and left home. Even though I’ve had a full time career all my life, my children leaving home made me feel older and transitional. I’m trying to focus harder on the positive rather than the negative. Your comment helped. Thank you!
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You’re right, there isn’t really just one death, there is a series of deaths. And some of them are actually good things. As for TJ Maxx (and Home Goods), the thrill of the hunt is the biggest lure! Great post!
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Sometimes I even venture into Forever 21. Do you have one of those near you? It’s a more challenging hunt at my age, but once in a while I walk out with a new shirt or skirt and a big smile on my face.
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Well, we have a lot in common! A lot of my fears have died-and good riddance! The need for approval. the need to impress and the need for stuff are some things . Of course youthful skin is gone- and a host of other things . . .that I do miss! great post!
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Ah yes! Thank you so much for reminding me of those other fears that have died–the need for approval, need to impress, need for stuff. I forgot about them, and they have thankfully passed on! I don’t know how it happened–but it did! I mean, how many charming souvenirs can you possibly buy in Vermont? LOL
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I’m curious. Could it be that your fears passed on by when you learned to do things for the fun of doing them? In my case, that’s how I lost many fears.
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That’s an interesting concept that I’ll have to think about. I’m not proud of this, but I’m kind of a fear-driven person. I have to go through a lot of layers before I get to the “fun” layer. LOL. But I’m always working on it. 🙂
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Interesting blog post, and a fascinating question, “What are the parts of you that have died?”
Too much and too many things to list them all. Once I was a small businessman employing 13 people. That passed on by. I became a free-spirit and a waiter who frequently took road trips with men and women half his age to every place we could think of, including nudist resorts — something I never thought I’d get into. But that passed on by too..
I don’t think there’s even one thing that’s constant in life. But among my favorite quotes is Kenko’s, “Uncertainty is the most precious thing in life.”
Thanks for your post.
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I love the way you’ve stretched yourself from one side of the spectrum to the other. Hard to do, and it must be fun! I love Kenko’s quote, which is very similar to one of my favorites which is: “The only thing that’s permanent is change.”
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Love this conversation, Cathi! And my mum’s also a big fan of TJ Maxx (though here it’s called Tk Maxx, don’t ask me why). If it had been her in the story she would have simply picked the rose up and then sprinted down to Tj maxx. 😉
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Ha ha! Your mum sounds like a fun lady. And I bet the UK version of TJ Maxx has some awesome styles. Wish I could shop there.
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Hmmm, you have asked a very complex question. This is something I’ve never really thought about, but will be doing so. The only thing I can think of right now is, when my Dad passed, a piece of my heart died, too. I suppose we all know that one, in some way. Thanks for making me think this out. It could solve some of the current issues I’m attempting to lay to rest. ❤
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My Dad passed away in 2008, and I guess I could say a piece of me died at that time, too. But on the other hand, his memory is very inspiring, so maybe I can bring that part of myself back to life. Maybe emotional death can live again if we allow it to. Interesting. Thanks for inspiring this thought.
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Oh, what a lovely idea. Bringing back a piece from a memory. Imagine how wonderful life would be if we were able to make ourselves whole again.
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Or maybe we’re not supposed to be the whole person we once were. Maybe we’re supposed to evolve into a combination/version of the whole person we’re meant to become. Or not. 🙂
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Oh, a brain twister! I’m pretty sure we are always evolving and never really know who we are meant to be as a whole. Each piece of us holds a different meaning to life. 🙂
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Beautiful thought.
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Thank you 🙂
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What a lovely, insightful story. Thank you.
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Thanks so much, Maria. Your supportive words always mean a lot to me.
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I relate to so much of this, and it made me smile too. I am intrigued by your blog and your style of writing. It is one of a kind.
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Aaaah. Thank you so very much for your kind words. I’m so happy my blog makes your smile and it means something to you. That means the world to me.
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This intriguing story definitely got me thinking! Thanks!
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I’m so glad. Woven around the craziness in the conversations, there is some sanity. I hope. 🙂
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What an original way to talk about our concerns regarding changes and to link it to shopping is brilliant! I confirm, there is no T. J. Maxx in Canada. But we do have Winners. Almost the same I heard. Treasure Hunt is the best thing about shopping. That’s why I love vintage store as well. By the way, I hate those skinny mirrors too. They should be prohibited by law. They create an illusion and therefore it is false advertising.
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I know! When I’m in a store with skinny mirrors and try something on in the dressing room, I say to myself, “Am I willing to buy this and know there’s a good chance I’ll have to return it because I won’t look as good in it when I look at myself wearing it in the mirror at home?” So annoying!!!!!
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I do not like it either when the mirrors, skinny or not, are outside the dressing room. This forces me to interact with the saleswoman who is waiting for me with a usual comment: “Oh wow, this blouse suits you so well.” This even if the buttons of the blouse will explode in her face because the garment is too small for me! So annoying.
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I hate that too! We should go shopping together sometime! 🙂
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Anytime!
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Well done! We all have those parts of us that died. Not died in a bad way, for they left memories to savor, but yes time keeps marching on to new and different experiences and there still is beauty in a dead rose.
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I own the dead rose in the photo in my post. It’s hanging as a dried flower in my kitchen and has been there for years. It lives on.
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🙂
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